i can see clearly now...

I know it's been awhile. My life has been very crazy in many ways. But things are going great. I have more good days than bad--that hasn't happened since I was about in seventh grade. I am amazed at what the right combination of meds does for my mood. I know I have truly been blessed.

At the start of the semester I only had two roommates, Stephanie and Taylor. We each had our own room, which was so nice. Last week two girls, Briana and Sam, moved in from another apartment, so Stephanie moved back into my room so that they could share a room. Stephanie is great. We have a lot in common: both 23, both English education majors, both juniors who should be seniors, both love cats, both read and love young adult books, both spent a lot of our childhood in Western Washington, both have the same taste in music, both in families of seven...the list goes on. This weekend we drove to Utah together because she was visiting her sister in South Weber.

So far I have made about six trips back to Utah just this semester. I know that seems like a lot...it is a lot. But it has been a lot of fun. I have only attended my campus ward twice this semester, though next weekend will be the third. Like last semester, I meet with my bishop weekly, though, so he knows me very well and knows that I'm going to my singles' branch at home. I went home all but one week in the month of May.

The first weekend was for Andra's wedding. It was so fun! Ashley Thornton flew down from Washington, and she, Stephanie, and I attended all the wedding festivities. We were invited to the pre-wedding family dinner at the Joseph Smith Memorial Building. The food was delicious, and we felt so special that we were invited to such a special night. The next morning we went to the temple to see Andra come out of the temple. She was absolutely beautiful, and so happy. That evening we went to the reception at her grandma's house. The three of us took turns sitting by "the book." Sarah and Mariah McGough came to the reception, so we were able to get a Colonial 501 reunion picture. It was so fun to catch up.

The next weekend I went home for Mother's Day. I brought my cousins Alex and Marc down from BYU-Idaho with me. Grammy, Gary, and Debi flew in and Rod, Jake, and Luke drove from Boise and stayed at our house. Alex spent his time with Eric, whose wife had a baby the week before. Dan and Tauna also flew in. We spent a lot of time listening to and laughing at Dan's and Gary's stories. They were so great! My mom and her brothers gave Grammy a new set of scriptures for Mother's Day. They each wrote a note in age order in the beginning, leaving a blank page for Teresa. It was very special.

The following weekend Mom and Stephanie flew to Washington for Liliana's first birthday and Rochelle's first ballet recital, so I drove down to spend the weekend with Dad. I ended up not seeing much of him, though, because he was on call and I was sick and in bed most of the time. We did watch Sherlock Holmes together, and another night we ordered pizza.

After a weekend in Rexburg, I went back to Utah for Memorial Day. Mom and Dad went to St. George for the weekend, and Paul spent a lot of time with his girlfriend Kimi, so Stephanie and I spent some time together. I played about a bazillion games of Text Twist on AddictingGames.com and watched quite a few movies. I watched Dear John with Stephanie and our friend Sheena. Steph and I later watched Angus, Thongs, and Perfect Snogging, based off of two books called Angus, Thongs, and Full-Frontal Snogging and On the Bright Side, I'm Now the Girlfriend of a Sex God. Don't worry, they're not as inappropriate as they sound! Well, I haven't read the second one, but the first one isn't as bad as it sounds. It's actually a hilarious book. The movie was cute. We also watched 17 Again and Earth, which is basically a shorter version of Planet Earth. We previewed it for Stephanie to show in class. It was very interesting. And lastly, I watched the 1950s version of Titanic. It had the dad from the original Cheaper By the Dozen and the maid from Pillow Talk. I was happy to see faces that I knew. I know, me being excited about that makes me a movie-freak, but I like being this way!

Hope you all are doing well! Bye for now!

the most magical place on earth and other fun places

The last month or so has been so busy. Sarah, Jessica, and their kids came to visit us for a few weeks. We had so much fun playing with the kids. Lily is getting so big, and is such a sweetheart. LaMar and Rochelle are growing up so fast. LaMar slept on the floor in my room, and my favorite part of the day was bedtime when I got to put him in bed and read stories. He is a sweet boy. Rochelle played dress-up and house, and all kinds of things. Sophie is no longer a baby! She is still as friendly as can be, and she, too, is sweet and fun. She is full of mischief. Sierra is a beautiful girl, ready to go into young women's on Sunday. Her twelfth birthday is on Saturday. She started junior high yesterday. I can't believe how grown-up she is.

For Stephanie's and Sierra's birthdays, the three of us spent three days in Disneyland. It was so fun going with Sierra, who had never been before. We went on almost every ride, met several characters, and went to some shows. My favorite was Soarin', a ride/show about California. You sit in front of a huge screen, they move the seats up high so you feel like you're in a hang-glider, and you see, hear, and smell beautiful California landscapes. Next to that, my favorite ride was the good old Space Mountain. I love not knowing where the track is going to take you. It makes the ride so much more exciting. Sierra's favorite ride was the Hollywood Tower of Terror. They take you up into what is supposed to be an old hotel where the elevator stops working at the top of the building. Then you plummet, free falling down, shooting back up, then dropping again. It is by far the scariest thing I have ever done. Thank goodness for anxiety meds.

After coming home from Disneyland we drove to Washington for Brianne's wedding. She was a beautiful bride. I still have a hard time believing that she's married. While in Washington we were able to spend more time with family. Rochelle and LaMar were part of the wedding party, so they were all dressed up. It was so cute. At the reception we danced with the kids. Justin and Jessica danced, and Rochelle and LaMar were trying to copy everything their parents did. It was funny to watch Rochelle, who is quite a bit taller than LaMar, try to spin into LaMar's arms and dip like Justin does with Jessica. What funny kids.

I'm going back to Rexburg on Tuesday. I'm grateful for this break, but I'm kind of ready to get back into school. I'm starting to get what I can only guess is the beginnings of senior-itis. I changed my major to English education, and I am ready to finish school so that I can start working, making money, and moving on with my life. I think I'm done being the student. I want to be the teacher for a little while. Stephanie's going back to school has made me want to become a teacher even more. I know it will be difficult, but I think I'm up for the challenge. I guess we'll see how ready I am in a year or two!

Back to the Burg!

I'm finally back at school! When left in March I thought six months was way too long to be away. But after several trips and lots and lots of therapy and pills, here I am. I'm not sure that I'm really ready to be back. Every day I doubt my decision to be back. But I know that I am very blessed. All of my classes are on Tuesdays and Thursdays, I have a job on campus (and I can work the hours I want without the stress of deadlines like Scroll!), great roommates, the best bishopric I think I've ever had, and a warm and comforting home just up the street from my apartment when I just can't take "it" (whatever "it" may be) anymore. I spend most of my time at the Samuelsons. I always feel like a burden, but they assure me they love having me, and are always more than willing to accept me into their family. And when I'm not over there, Shauna asks where I am and why I'm not playing Family Feud or Pyramid with them, or sitting on their couch studying until I either fall asleep or have to hurry back to my apartment before the "sleepy pills" kick in for me and/or Elisabeth. We have a lot of fun watching Brian Regan over and over and over and over (I'm not sure I have enough "over"s in there). Thursday nights are Little Caesars pizza nights, and Sundays are Iron Chef nights. Lately Shauna, Elisabeth, and I have been watching Project Runway. It's not usually one I would watch on my own, but once it gets turned on, I just can't peel my eyes away.

But being "back to school" is not all about TV and Brian Regan and Meet the Robinsons and sleeping pills (though sometimes it seems like it). I am taking a lighter load of classes this semester than ever before, but that does not mean that it's easy by any means. I'm having a great struggle trying to find my place, trying to find a routine, trying to decide if I'm really ready to be back at school. But still I go, meeting with a counselor once a week and a psychiatrist once a month (incidentally, he is the father of my good friend Nicolas Zohner), and I try to get my homework done even when I don't feel up to it. Besides tutor training, I am taking two online classes (very simple, basic courses on time management and note-taking), and three classes that I attend on Tuesdays and Thursdays.

The first class is American Literature: Colonial to Romantic. I have Brother Hammond for this class, a teacher I've never had before, but I will definitely take more classes from him in the future. He is a wonderful teacher, and I absolutely LOVE the subject matter. We get to read fun things like Native American creation and flood stories--very fascinating and often so full of truth--and letters written by Christopher Columbus and various Puritans. I've always been afraid of works written during this time period, but I'm finding that it's really not as difficult as I'd always thought.

Next I have Young Adult Literature, taught by Paula Soper, one of my dear friends. This is one of the classes that I was enrolled in last winter when I dropped out. I absolutely love this class. I get to read all kinds of books that I probably wouldn't normally pick up but that are so amazing. And what's awesome is that I'm getting credit for reading them! I have to be careful, though, because I tend to put off my other homework, and I have great justification for it--it's homework too! And the Book Orders. Oh Book Orders. I have a great weakness for them. Somehow I managed to get away with only spending $10.00 on the September Book Order!

And finally, I have Doctrines of the Gospel. I would say this is my favorite class, but I love all my classes so much. My teacher is Brother Wightman, the same teacher I had for all of my scripture-based classes. He is one of the best teachers I've ever had. Going into class is like walking into a portal where everything in the world completely disappears and we have a full hour to ask questions and explore some of the deep doctrines of the gospel. I get more in one of those lessons than I do in a whole three hours of church.

Some of you may know that while I was struggling this summer, my church attendance slipped. You can be sure that it is not because I was losing my testimony. And now, in a desire to commit myself more fully to Heavenly Father, I have been attending my ward from 9-12, and then going to the Samuelsons' ward from 1-4. Pulling double-duty is difficult, but I feel like I owe it to myself and to God to make up for the lost time. And I'm actually enjoying going to both wards.

I should probably end for now. I will try to keep this blog updated as much as possible. It's not like my life is all that exciting, so it might not get updated too much...But you never know what might happen in Rexburg. :) Check out my suggested reading list if you're interested in some GREAT books.

To Idaho and Back Again

I know it's been a while since I updated this blog. At last I have something to write about. I just spent almost two weeks in Rexburg with the Samuelsons. I had such a wonderful time there. While I was there I saw both Wall E and Kung Fu Panda (for the second time), and they were absolutely fabulous. I know I say this about every movie, but they are two of my favorites. Seriously. I also introduced the worlds of Brian Regan, "Human Tetris," and "fainting goats" to Elisabeth, and watched them all for endless hours on YouTube. Elisabeth and I spent some time painting, and both Saturdays I was there I watched Scott paint. He is an amazing artist. I love watching him work. I helped with cleaning while I was there, which definitely makes me feel right at home. I played a little too much with the three Samuelson cats--Milo, Asher, and Badger. My hands and feet are practically in pieces because I teased them and then got what I deserved. We watched a lot of Whose Line is It Anyway?, a favorite show in the Samuelson house. We also watched quite a bit on the Food Network, which is quickly becoming one of my favorite channels, and a little Mystery Science Theater 3000. Elisabeth and I both did quite a bit of writing, which was so good for me. It had been a long time since I'd written. Most of the time we spoke to each other in movie quotes. Elisabeth is the first person I've met that has been able to out-quote me! I still have her beat in Disney movies and Brian Regan, but she is quickly learning the best Regan phrases.

I spent Independence Day with the Samuelsons. We didn't make a big deal out of the holiday, which I prefer. Scott made a Dutch oven lunch, and Shauna made vanilla ice cream. It was so good! We spent the rest of the afternoon napping and playing Wii. That night, rather than watching fireworks, we watched a movie called Miss Firecracker, starring Holly Hunter. It was a pretty good movie, but a little depressing.

While I was there, I secured a job at the Reading Center in the McKay Library on campus. Julie Engstrom, the head of the Reading Center, is a good friend of mine. She gave me a job as a tutor that I will begin in the fall. I'm a little nervous about it, but I'm also excited. I finally get to say goodbye to Scroll (I've been waiting for that day!) and now have a job that hopefully won't give me ulcers like being a copy editor. I'm looking forward to the experience.

I am looking forward to getting back to Rexburg for school. In the meantime, I am going to enjoy the rest of my summer as family and friends come to visit. Today Elisabeth is arriving to stay for the week. Later in the month Sarah and her family will be here, and next month I have some extended family coming to stay.

I hope everyone is doing well and had a fun and safe July 4th!